Mystery Meat and Mustard

Last night I was scrounging through the fridge for some dinner, when I began to contemplate food in general. At that point I had found something, but I don't know if it was worth putting in my mouth. It was a hot dog, with lots and lots of mustard to disguise the flavor. I hated hot dogs as a kid, and the only way that was semi-enjoyable was when Mom would make weenie men out of them, and give them mustard and ketchup faces and buttons. Or as we called ketchup and mustard, 'roo-up and sardeenest'. Don't ask me why we kids came up with those names. I can only assume it's genetics. The Strong cousins are notorious for coming up with strange names for things. Some of the more memorable ones are Kweefer (a poor, beloved and mangled doll who had new tatoos every summer), bahoonawhiffer, and blinkenshlumpshlahotski. I have no idea what those things are. You'll have to ask Carrie. Grandma has also been known to come up with a few: Ishkabibble and GorKenDeanel being two that I know about. It must be her that we get the word genes from. But I digress....

As I was chewing on my mustard, it occured to me that I have never tasted some foods that are probably American, but never talked about...maybe for good reasons. Parsnips, turnips, and rutabagas came to mind. I've never had those things, and they've been sitting on the produce shelves my whole life! That's a very sad thing in my opinion, especially considering my foray into new foods during my single years. At one point I decided that I was going to try one new food at the grocery store each month as a way to bring some excitement into my life. Yeah I know, I was really living on the edge, but this is ME we're talking about. It was edgy.

So into my life walked kippered snacks, sardines, 'seafood medley' (which is octopus, squid, mussels, shrimp, scallops, and probably some other stuff that got caught in the net), papaya, key limes, kalamata olives, fresh ginger, fresh trout, and some weird wild orange berry that grows on a penisula jutting out into the ocean by Netarts, Oregon. Okay, so maybe I should have left that one alone. But in any case, some of those were keepers, and some probably should have been left on the shelf, but at least I found out and didn't have to go through life wondering.

So I think that I may have to revive that tradition and continue my culinary quest of the American grocery store. Next on my list: capers. What are they? I'm going to find out.